The coronavirus is causing a lot of stress these days. Some people worry about their financial situation because of lack of work, while others are under more work pressure than ever. In the meantime, parents struggle to find a good work-life balance now that schools are closed. You’d think that under these circumstances relationships would also come under pressure. And yet, relationships have proved to be quite resilient in the past months. “Within families, we see that partners have more time and attention for each other,” says Kluwer.
That doesn’t mean relationships are unaffected by stress and worries about issues like work and income. What’s more: “We sent out our questionnaires to people in still intact relationships. Although we used a representative research sample, we don’t know what the consequences have been for the greatest risk groups, such as families living in extreme poverty. In addition, we did these measurements in July and October. I would like to do a new measurement now that we seem to be entering a third coronavirus wave.” Still, based on this and earlier studies Kluwer is able to make some suggestions on how to get through the coronavirus crisis with a strong loving relationship.
- Help each other deal with the stress
The partner’s response plays a crucial role in reducing stress. “If your partner blames you or trivialises your stress, it will clearly affect your relationship. Listen to your partner and show understanding. If they are worried about finances, help them think through possible solutions. If they suffer from too much work pressure, help reduce stress by taking over some tasks. You could for example help your partner with household tasks. It goes without saying that what counts as useful help and support is different within each relationship. Some partners just need you to show some support and understanding, while others will be relieved if you take on some additional tasks.”
- Seek support in your social network
The extent to which people can fall back on a social network of friends and family turns out to be crucial for the degree of stress they experience. “This is striking since physical contact is complicated at the moment. But calling someone on the phone to talk about your worries can already make a difference. And within the limitations set by the coronavirus measures, you can still meet to walk or exercise together, which helps blow off steam. Even if you don’t suffer from stress yourself, it’s always a good idea to ask your friends or colleagues how they’re doing.”
- Keep devoting time and attention to each other (also after the coronavirus crisis)
A positive change many people mentioned is the fact that they spend more time together and devote more attention to each other, both between partners and between parents and children. This leads to families feeling closer. “Fathers for example are better able to follow their children’s progress at school. Of course, we hope that the world will soon open up and that when the time comes everyone spreads their wings once again; but it would be a shame if all the time and attention we now have for one another disappeared as a result.”
Photography: Unsplash.